Boys [Wednesday, Aug. 11, 2004, 10:42 am]
It's all the talk in our youth group right now: there's been a break-up. Another one. And it really doesn't surprise me. Relationships like that, between young teens, are one of the reasons I can say that I'm glad I haven't dated yet. Because all of the relationships that I've seen have either not lasted very long, or ended up getting too serious, resulting in broken hearts and loss of innocence. Do I really want that?
In some ways, I feel sorry for the boy in the aforementioned relationship. He's a great guy, but he's only 15 years old. He's not mature enough to handle all of the emotional needs of a maturing young girl.
And in some ways, I feel sorry for the girl too. Because she was expecting this 15-year-old boy to be able to handle all of her problems and meet every single one of her needs.
I'm certainly not any kind of relationship expert, but it seems to me, through my own observations, that one of the problems some young girls have in relationships, is that they're trying to view the boy as their savior. It doesn't take long before he's the center of their entire world. No wonder their hearts are so broken when the relationship ends (as they usually do).
I think that's a natural characteristic of most of us females - we desire attachment like that. But the problem seems to be that boys mature differently than girls. So a girl may have all these emotional needs beginning to develop at, say, 14. And yet, none of the 14-year-old boys are really mature enough to take care of those needs yet.
Maybe that's why waiting is so hard.
But maybe that's also why I'm glad I'm still single, at 18 years of age. Learning from other peoples' mistakes, I know that treating a boy like a god or an idol is only going to end in a broken heart, eventually.
And I also know that there's a God out there, who wants to be #1 in my life. Not second to some boy.
I admit, I do have this small fear of never finding the right guy to spend my life with. But my bigger fear should be of making a guy an idol. I don't ever want to do that - no matter how "in love" I may become. I've seen girls fall away from a good relationship with God, and regular attendance at church, just for the sake of some boy.
I don't ever want to do that either.
"Boys are eeeeeeevil!"
-Thom Hazel- (of cleft in the rock)
Vitality - Tuesday, Aug. 11, 2009